| Niles Standish | |
|---|---|
| |
| Character Information | |
| Gender | Male |
| Species | Human |
| Family | Louise (Goddaughter) Giles (Brother; Season 5) |
| Age | Unknown |
| Production Information | |
| Voiced by |
Tony Barbieri |
Niles Standish is the British Earl of Yankerville. He appears in all 5 seasons of Crank Yankers.
Pranks[]
- Portrait Studio: Niles wants some portrait work of him done, of him (sexually) on top of 3 Irishmen in the nude.
- Niles Needs A New Suite: Niles calls "a Doll Shop" to have clothing made for him, and breaks the 4th wall.
- Invitations: Niles wants a woman named Betty to make invitations to "an Ass-Slapping Contest."
- Niles Hires A Receptionist: Niles keeps interrupting the receptionist he wants to hire. He than explodes from endlessly saying “BIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBIBI.”
- Wedding planner: Niles plans a Wedding between him and his Aunt Gertie. Unfortunately, Aunt Gertie died while he was on the phone.
- Niles calls a Ranch: Niles wants to go on a trip to a Ranch and be an American Cowboy.
- Hot Air Balloon Ride: Niles wants to make hot manlove in a hot air balloon and join the Mile High Balloon Club.
- Assistants: Niles wants assistants for things he doesn't want to get his hands dirty doing anymore, like peeing and being fed.
- A Chamber of Commerce: Niles wants to build a rehab center for Sex Offenders, called The Lollipop House.
- Niles the Godfather: Niles gets a call meant for his goddaughter Louise, from a sexy young man on Match.com.
- Caulk: Niles wants a Caulk (which he thought was a Cock).
- Niles Hires a Doula: Niles hires a Doula, and gives birth to a Poop-Looking Baby.
- The Las Vegas Showmen: Niles is looking for recruits for his new NBA Franchise, “The Las Vegas Showmen.”
- Moon Bouncer: Niles calls a bouncy house rental shop for a moon bouncer, then asks Bob about his attendant. He then asks about oil, saying that he likes to relieve himself on the rental apparati.
- Leather Chaps: Niles would like to Purchase some Leather Chaps, but his brother wants the chaps, too.
- Lice: Niles talks about how he, his new Orangutan, and Giles, eat each other’s lice. It later turns to them presumably having a threesome, followed by the three of them riding on a giant lice.